English, the Long-Suffering Language

A restaurant for people, or for fish?

As English has become the world's language, it's suffered at the hands of non-speakers who believe it's cool to use English - even when they don't know how to.

A few examples I've seen around Bogotá.

The barber ghetto shop is in Teusaquillo, which is no ghetto.

This band wears bibs!

This is supposed to mean something.

A light kiosk - as opposed to a full-calorie kiosk?

Does Independence Park also have a Kiosk Heavy?

Almost got it!

Just in case you missed it the first time.

You'd think that the Museo de Oro (Gold Museum) could pawn a few nuggets and buy an English grammar book.

Can you understand?

'American School Way'. It'd be good enough - if they weren't supposed to be TEACHING English.

And a classic from the city of Cali.

A medal from the 2013 World Games in Cali left out a critical 'L', giving the competition a whole new meaning. 

This restaurant in La Candelaria managed to spell 'coffee' incorrectly twice - and in two different ways. 

coffe

Coofee

'Specialists in Frecuency Brain.' Sounds impressive, unless you know something about biology, psychology or English. 

Another victim of Google Translate.

By Mike Ceaser, of Bogotá Bike Tours

English a la Colombiana

My Doggish Veterinaria - Maybe this is why he gets on so well with canines.

The new old look: Dreadlooks. 

'Prohibiting the entry of perts.' Well, hopefully it's clear to the perts.

A brawny brownie. 

A sadwich? Appetizing?

Broaster, I suspect, comes from the English 'roasted.' 'Coffe' is a combination of the English words 'coffee' and the Spanish 'cafe.'

'Chicken Hell' Undercover vegans? Chicken Hell, in the red light district.

Well, rice IS food. This originally named restaurant has several restaurants in Bogota.

'Producto of Colombian.' The name says it all, in neither language. 

By Mike Ceaser, of Bogotá Bike Tours